I was excited to get my sample ballot, but the voter information guide is even better! It has 250 word statements from the various candidates, and even in “normal” elections is usually good for a laugh at the expense of the loonies.

However, I was disappointed by many candidates who did not submit a statement. Nothing from Gary Coleman or Gallagher? No comment from Mary Carey? Not even a “hasta la vista” from Arnold? (In order to get a statement printed in the voter guide, the candidate must accept an expenditure limit of about $10.6 million, which presumably accounts for Arnold’s absence, as well as Tom McClintock. Bustamante, Huffington, and Camejo all accepted the spending limit.) Bustamante likes the italics. Camejo is one of those Instant Runoff Voting dorks. (Right – Green Party.) Arianna isn’t a huge fan of complete sentences. These guys are all very boring compared to, say, Trek Thunder Kelly: “Dear Voters, Please vote for me, thus breaking the Seventh Seal and incurring Armageddon.” I’ll have to remember him.